Whatever type of loss you've suffered, there is no right or wrong way to grieve. But by understanding the stages and types of grief, you can find healthier ways to cope.
What is Grief?
Grief is a natural response to loss. It is the emotional suffering you feel when something or someone you love is taken away. Often, the pain of loss can feel overwhelming. You may experience all kinds of difficult and unexpected emotions, from shock or anger to disbelief, guilt, and profound sadness. The pain of grief can also disrupt your physical health, making it difficult to sleep, eat, or think straight. These are normal reactions to loss— and the more significant the loss, the more intense your grief can be.
Your loss is personal to you, so don't feel ashamed about your emotions or believe that it's somehow only appropriate to grieve for certain things. If the person, animal, relationship, or situation was significant to you, it's normal to suffer the loss you are experiencing.
Whatever the cause of your grief, though, there are healthy ways to cope with the pain that, in time, can ease your sadness and help you come to terms with your loss, find new meaning, and eventually move on with your life.
The Grieving Process
Grieving is a highly individual experience; there is no right or wrong way to grieve. How you grieve depends on many factors, including your personality and coping style, your life experience, your faith, and how significant the loss was to you.
The grieving process takes time. Healing happens gradually; it can't be forced or hurried— and there is no "normal" timetable for grieving. Some people start to feel better in weeks or months. For others, the grieving process takes years. Whatever your grief experience, it's important to be patient with yourself and allow the process to unfold naturally.
The Stages of Grief
In 1969, psychiatrist Elisabeth Kübler-Ross introduced what became known as the "five stages of grief." These stages of grief were based on her studies of the feelings of patients facing terminal illness, but many people have generalized them to other types of negative life changes and losses, such as the death of a loved one or a break-up.
Denial: "This can't be happening to me."
Anger: "Why is this happening? Who is to blame?"
Bargaining: "Make this not happen, and in return, I will ."
Depression: "I'm too sad to do anything."
Acceptance: "I'm at peace with what happened."
